Genius!
by needia13
Summary: Harry brings his family to meet the Dursleys 14 years after the war... Set in the same universe to my other story Welcome Lily Luna Potter but you don't need to read that to understand this


**Disclaimer: I do not own Harry Potter**

**What you should know: This is the first time Harry has seen the Dursleys in about 15 years. None of the other Potters have ever seen them before. **

A dark blue sedan pulled up outside of number four, Privet Drive. It rolled to a stop and its five passengers clambered out.

"Daddy, do we have to?" The youngest pouted, clutching her fathers hand tightly.

"I'm afraid we do Lils. And you'll be on your very best behaviour, won't you" Harry replied. The four-year-old nodded dramatically, her red hair bouncing wildly.

"That includes not turning Albus green" Harry continued, smirking slightly. "I didn't _mean_ to," she said, her wide eyes blinking innocently up at him "He hurt Sammy and I was just so _angry_"

"It was an accident" Albus pipped up from the other side of Harry "Besides its only a stupid doll"

"Sammy is not stupid!" Lily cried out as she tried to lunge at Albus around Harry.

"Hey now, guys what did I say before we got in the car" He said sternly. Both of the children nodded, their expressions going from angry to sorry. He ruffled both of their hair, took a hand each and started up the garden.

Ginny was having her own problems with her eldest son as they both trailed behind the other three.

"James. Hand them over now. This is your final chance. Don't make me _Accio_ them!" She said, holding out her hand in front of him. "Remember what your father said?"

"I don't have anything! I swear on Merin's Wand!" James replied, showing her his turned-out pockets.

Ginny snorted "I didn't grow up with Fred and George for nothing. _Accio_" Sweets flew out from the turn-ups of his jeans and from a seemingly secret compartment in his shoes.

"I didn't know they were there!" James exclaimed. At Ginnys knowing face, he amended his statement "Maybe I did, but it was Uncle George's fault! He gave them to me for free as long as I gave them to the Dursleys tonight!"

Ginny nodded, informed James of his not being off the hook, and stuffing the sweets into her bag, made a mental note to send a howler to her brother when she got home.

They rang the doorbell. Vernon Dursley opened the door, ushering the Potters inside, glancing up and down the street.

"Uncle Vernon" Harry said, shaking the mans hand. Vernon Dursley hadn't changed during the years, he was still the overweight, bumbling buffoon Harry remembered. "This is my wife, Ginny" He said, wrapping his arm around her waist. "And our children James, eight, Albus, six and Lily, four"

Vernon grunted his acknowledgement and gestured towards the sitting room.

Inside the room sat Aunt Petunia, Dudley, a woman Harry presumed was Dudley's wife (Although when he first saw her he could have sworn it was Aunt Marge), and two young boys. Introductions were made. The woman was Mildred (and she was indeed Dudley's wife) and the two boys were Charles, seven, and Simon, four.

The night was altogether a very awkward one. Mildred spoke only a few words, and even then it was to criticize the cooking, or the furniture or the company. Vernon sat back and glared with beady eyes at all the Potters in the room.

Charles and Simon argued through out the night, resorting to attacking each other when things didn't go their way (which was considerably more then once). The Potter children sat by their parents, silently, looking like angels compared to the Dursleys. Dudley spent his time trying to mediate between the two boys and trying to placate his wife, neither of which he had any success at.

Aunt Petunia, after getting over her shock of a miniture Lily barging into her life, spent the time sending subtle and sometimes no-so-subtle barbs at Ginny, who easily held her own against the horse-faced woman. Harry spent the night glaring at his Aunt and Uncle as well as trying to keep his own children occupied.

Dinner was spent in the same manner and the Potters were glad, when, an hour later, Lily began to doze off in Harry's lap. They prepared to leave immediately and the good-byes were quickly said.

Dudley pulled Harry aside just as they were about to leave. "Sorry about them" He made a motion towards the sitting room. Harry just nodded, knowing that that was not what Dudley had wanted to say.

"Well, I was just curious..." He trailed off and Harry looked at him curiously "How did you get your kids to stay silent? Its just I've been coming here since they were born and they've never behaved that good!"

Harry let out a deep chuckle "Well, Big D, I have one word for you- and it has never failed me to this day!" Dudley nodded eagerly "What is it then?"

Harry laughed again "Bribery" And he was out the door and into his car, before Dudley could even wrap his mind around the word.

"Bribery! Genius!"


End file.
